Unfinished piece, one of a series, called Fly, Dream
fabric, thread, photography, and ultimately beads as well.
Okay, so about 10 days have gone by and I have not written or posted pictures. The thing is, I have actually been working and making pieces for a show in May. So how does one manage the time to create and also write about creating, which should be creating in and of itself? It's a question I ponder when I can't sleep at night. The other thing I think about is the fact that I tried to cliff dive during our family vacation to Mexico. Now let me be specific, it was only about 20 feet high. I climbed up there all confident, took a breath, ran toward the edge ... and then just stopped head hanging out over the side, with my feet gripping the edge. Thinking this was just a one-time freeze, I tried again, and again, and again. I was up there for at least 30 minutes. Strangers from all over the world were cheering me on to jump. One wise-ass from England, kept making gasping noises just as I would get to the edge--which I must say did make it more difficult to jump, though I guess I can't really blame him for my lack of courage. My husband kept telling me to just do it. Like the Nike ads--you know I don't see any Nike reps jumping off of cliffs! My kids were yelling at me to just jump so we could get on with what we were doing. And I swear, I really thought I was going to. But I didn't. It was very disappointing. I try to do something outside my comfort zone every time we go away or try new things, just so I can show my kids that it is healthy to try new things and face your fears. Well this fear seemed to stare me down and I realized that fear is really quite intangible, but sometimes very, very solid and immovable. And it is fear that artist feel every time they start a new piece, get stuck in the middle of a piece, or even just finish one. I have all these pieces that have not been finished, and I am hoping to face those fearsome little pieces and turn them into something I can feel proud of.